♥ Feb. 14 is quickly approaching. Are you single and dreading the day when lovey-dovey couples, kissing and cuddling, will be swirling all around you?

If no, great. You do not have to read the rest of this article. If yes, great. You have to read the rest of this article.

So, Valentine’s Day is giving you a little anxiety? Have you asked yourself why you feel this way? Since I cannot answer this question for you, I will simply share a few of my insights and hope that by the end of this article, you have a refreshed view of being single on Valentine’s Day.

♥ Don’t disparage other people’s plans.

Saying things like, (insert rolling eyes here) “Too much is made of Valentine’s Day,” or “The whole thing is sooo stupid,” is being a killjoy. Clearly, if Valentine’s Day is special for someone, then it’s a special day! It does not have to be special for you when you are in a relationship. Each couple chooses to celebrate in their own way. Who knows, Valentine’s Day might be the one big day when a couple goes all out.

♥ Embrace others’ relationships.

How are your friends supposed to set you up if you do not show the emotional maturity to be happy for them? The ability to be happy for others is a sign of self-awareness and personal growth. This skill will reward you in more ways than one, because, mainly, it will make it easier for you to focus on what you have, rather than what you don’t have and think you need.

♥ Stop assuming you are missing out.

You do not know the real nature of people’s relationships. Sometimes couples end up going through the motions on Valentine’s Day. There are pros and cons to being in a relationship, just as there are to being single. Make the most of whatever situation you are in by appreciating, in equal measure, being in a relationship and being single. In the blink of the eye, you may be catapulted into the other category.

♥ Do something nice for someone else.

Rather than stew about your circumstances, make it easy for a friend to celebrate Valentine’s Day. You can volunteer to babysit, let them leave work early or loan them something special to wear. I remember when my college housemate, Mariah, went out on a first date with her now husband, we all loaned her something special to wear from our closets. Not to brag, but it was my scarf that really tied the outfit together! Or use this day to check in on someone who has lost their spouse or is recently divorced.

♥ It’s not about you.

Realize that Valentine’s Day is traditionally and commercially geared towards couples, who get only one formal day in the year to celebrate. Singles get 364 days to roam around the world single. Do you hear couples complain about you being single those other 364 days? A little jealous maybe, but never complaining.

♥ Recommit to being in a relationship.

If having someone in your life, in an emotionally healthy way, is that important to you, spend the day planning on how to get back in the game. You know where you are right now and what you need to do. Do you need to get in shape for more energy and self-confidence? Do you need to de-clutter your emotional house and your physical house? A new haircut to refresh your appearance? A few new pieces for the wardrobe? Whatever you decide, make sure these changes are beneficial to you as a whole person as well as making you ready for a relationship.

Fast forward to Feb. 15. Recognize that on the 15th, all your challenges and blessings will still be there. The same is true for couples. Both singles and couples will not be any more in love or any less in love than they were on Feb. 13.

I hope that these insights allow you singles to see over and through your apprehensions surrounding Valentine’s Day. One day does not cancel out all your other great days. If you are single, I encourage you to be supportive and joyful towards those around you who are excited about Valentine’s Day. It’s the way you want to be treated when the shoe is on your foot.

 

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